Iam a Female Feminist !

A stereotype is not feedback. A stereotype is based on fear.

A Feedback is based on evidence.

For 18 years, after my father's death, I built a career. I paid my own bills. I funded part of my education. I travelled the world alone. I cared for my elderly mother. Every difficult decision, every responsibility, every setback—I carried it myself.

Yet, at times, those eighteen lonely years seem to disappear the moment I say I am attracted to a man. Society assumes that I am looking for a provider rather than a partner.

A woman who has lived independently for eighteen years does not surrender her independence the moment she chooses to love someone.

It can feel as though the only thing that matter to society are that I have never walked into a wedding hall as a bride or into a labour room to give birth to a child.

The stereotype reveals far more about society's assumptions than it does about the woman herself.

A separated woman may view an independent single unmarried woman through the lens of her own fears and insecurity. These woman reproduce patriarchal values because they were raised within the same system and hence they support men who enforce patriarchy. Particularly true among woman from the state of Punjab in India.

If I had wanted a relationship for the sake of provision and protection, I would not have remained a virgin for all these years. That fact alone should be enough to challenge the assumptions and stereotypes people make about me.

While men may interpret a single unmarried woman's independence as a challenge to his ego and personal identity. Women like me, who believe our achievements should stand on their own merit—not be credited to any man's influence—may find it harder to access opportunities in environments shaped by such expectations. Particularly true among men from the State of Punjab in India.

North India believes that outward style is woman empowerment. But their thinking is too old fashioned and patriarchal by nature.

I have seen a Punjabi woman leave a 17-year old marriage after finding a partner outside her marriage.

Men seem to be telling me that her ability to tolerate those mango jokes is what makes her courageous. She already had 16 years of experience. What kind of courage are they talking about.

So how can they expect me to behave like a “married woman” when I have never chosen that life? That is not belonging; that is fitting into a mould created by other people's expectations.

While these men and women try to convince themselves that I fear men, the truth is very different: I simply don't want to cling to anything in life. I want to be free.

They don't have the capacity to measure my courage because they are measuring it against a definition of courage that I don't subscribe to.

Iam a Feminist !